Brits Bag Bozo

Lord, for what he received, I hope he was truly grateful.

Namely, a magazine of British 5.56mm.

On or about 5JUN2002, Al-Queda’s top Ops Planner Omar al-Farouq — was doing what he did best in Indonesia and wound up getting snatched by the locals, who promptly turned him over to us.

We stuck his happy butt in a high-security prison in Afghanistan and started asking questions. At first he wasn’t talking very much, but after a couple of months we may (or may not) have graduated to … enthusiastic … questioning, at which point he apparently sang like a canary.

He was the “intelligence source” that caused our first ever elevation to ‘Orange’ on that dumb-arse threat ladder.

Anyhoo, he provided quite a bit of reliable information, before breaking out and running for the hills on 10JUL2005.

Once free, Omar got a bit freedom-happy — showed up on al-Araybia TeeVee in Dubai to cock a snook in our general direction, amongst other kittenish activities — but never relaxed enough for us to get our paws on him.

Well, just before dawn this morning Brit troopies visited a house in Basra — no, don’t get up, we’ll let ourselves in — and during the confusion of the visit someone who wasn’t wearing British colours cranked off some rounds in their general direction.

This little display got the shooter reclassified from ‘Tiresome’ to ‘A Bloody Nuisance’ and the irritated troopies shot him to doll rags.

After the screaming and exploding and shooting got all done, the Brits discovered that their early-morning bullet-magnet turned out to be none other than Omar himself.

That’s another one down.

Thanks, guys.


Vaya con Dios, Colonel
*snicker, snicker*

9 thoughts on “Brits Bag Bozo”

  1. don’t mean to sound blood-thirsty, but what a great way to start off the week.

  2. Probably better than he deserved, but better than having him scurrying around.

    Now if only they could get on the ball with Zawahiri…


  3. An early Christmas present.

    I could stand to read quite a few more of these obituaries.

  4. On an emotional level, I have to add my hurrah to the previous three. And while I too do not want to sound bloodthirsty, I can’t help but be satisfied that such a total goblin finally gets back what he’s been dishing out for so long.

    More seriously, let’s not forget: Even if we don’t always identify a special bad guy, the law of averages will help us rack up a nice score if we just keep on fighting.


  5. He didn’t suffer enough, compared to what he caused other’s suffering. He got off cheaply and quickly, unfortunately.

  6. Too bad there aren’t a few more terrorists out there outfitted with magnets that just somehow seem to attract our bullets. What a blessing that would be.

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