Well, Mom calls Dispatch and tells them that Nana is scheduled for surgery to drain the infection on Friday, Dispatch calls my supervisor, my supervisor — not knowing me just too well quite yet — solemnly and with great gravity takes me to a quiet place to give me the news that Nana was going into surgery.
Schmuck started out by telling me that the Department Chaplain was available if I felt the need — before telling me that Nana was simply heading for the OR. Scared the [deleted] out of me. I thought Nana had augered in on the table.
Anyhoo, Nana got down to the OR, the surgeon and his minion talked with her for a while, then everyone decided not to do surgery.
I hadn’t realized that it was an option.
They bunged Nana back upstairs, told the nurses that they changed their minds about surgery, and the nurses had a melt-down. Seems that Nana hadn’t had anything to eat or drink for the previous 12 hours, nor had she been given her meds.
The melt-down — in and of itself — was nothing but a testament to the dedication of the nursing staff.
How-some-ever, the nurse who called me to give me the news was still over-wrought from the melt-down, and simply left the following message on my voice-mail: “Your grandmother isn’t going to have surgery.”
Since the message was delivered in a voice still quivering from the melt-down, I immediately thought Nana was too far gone for surgery to help and I hauled butt for the hospital, mentally assembling A List Of Those Who Were Going To Be Very Sorry.
Imagine my state of mind when I button-hooked the door into her room and discovered an empty bed?
Promptly assuming the worst (what happens when we ASS-u-ME, students?), I trudged to the nurses station and shakily enquired as to the location of my grandmother.
Sayeth the nurse, “She isn’t in her room?”
I blink. Nurse trundles into Nana’s room, and yelps, “Oh, goddammit, Mildred’s gone again!”
Short search later, and Nana is discovered in the cafeteria — five floors down — noshing happily on roasted chicken with cajun rice and telling stories to a pack of enthralled cafeteria personnel.
The doctor says that Nana has two different bugs in the surgery site. However, he’s of the opinion that Nana is healthy enough to shake the infection with IV vancomycin, so that’s what we’re doing.
You know … sometimes I wonder what a normal life would be like.