Oh, God

I sound like a complete and total yutz.

I surprised the host of the Internet call show and tested this equipment. I should not do that.


I’ve got hay-fever, I swear. And the boom mike on this thing is halfway up my snout. People don’t normally hear me inhaling, I swear to God.

I’m so stressed out that my accent is sliding all over the place.


I’m going to crawl under the bed and not show my face for a week.


Meditations on equal protection
Tactical advice

21 thoughts on “Oh, God”

  1. It Tweren’t thaaat bad LD. trust me listen to some of my Early Shows.

  2. LD,

    Your interview was fine and I enjoyed it. Your accent is fantastic, your sense of humor is wonderful, and even with you having hay-fever, it didn’t matter at all, as it shouldn’t.

    I’m really looking forward to Thursday.

  3. I somehow doubt that I’m supposed to be twice as loud as the host; it’s tacky to inhale like a moose preparing to call bugle; and I need to check my smart-alec mouth at the door.


  4. LD, I use a special Hands free phone with the mic about 3-4 inches from my mouth, when I used my boom handsfree I sounded even louder than you did on the show. If it helps I’ll adjust the mic so my volume is a little bit louder.


  5. It twere that bad…really. Not you, but the audio itself. By the time I lowered the volume so your voice was recognizable, barely, the host was inaudible.

    Next time will be better…really. Consider it necessary practice.


  6. My dear man, you don’t sound like Alvin, on anything, nor do you sound like a yutz. I didn’t notice your accent sliding, but given that mine can be all over the map too (generic educated north east US, with forays into West Brit, Belfast and the South), I wouldn’t notice anyway.

  7. My only complaint is that I can’t hear the host without cranking my itty bitty speakers up to full blast, and press my ear to them. Then your voice is pretty loud. I don’t think that yours is so loud as his is so very freaking quiet.

    And smart alec is what you do, ‘Dog. It does of course beat at least one alternative. . .

    Mark, if you’re the interviewer, please crank it up!

    Good on you for doing a little trial run. LD can chat intelligently for hours, but let a recorder and/or a camera come on, and his reticence is impressive.

  8. I missed the live broadcast, but downloaded the .mp3 this a.m. and gave it a listen.   LawDog, IMHO, your ‘performance’ was very good.   I.e., you speak like you write and that isn’t a bad thing!   Like you mention in the comments here, the issues were technical issues with the audio.   Try not to be so critical of yourself.   Once the audio issues get worked out the other issues, will most likely, become none issues.   I, for one, am looking forward to listening to more conversations with ‘The LawDog’.

  9. I also missed the live broadcast, but would like to download the mp3. Does anyone have an address?
    And Lawdog, it can’t have been that bad!

  10. I’ve been interviewed on TV & radio, too. I’d rather fight Armageddon with a limp spaghetti noodle, but “a man’s gotta do ….”

    You’ll get better.

  11. For everyone looking for the link to the show, Law Dog has it posted in his blog, but I’ll post it here as well. it isn’t clickable you’ll have to cut and paste it or backspace to his post and click in his blog so here goes,


    That is the address to my host page. as far as my audio goes I apologize, when I first tried the show with my boom mic I use for my Ham radio I was WAAAAaaayyyyy to loud so I bought a special handsfree telephone similar to an old PBX phone at a business. I’ll have to adjust where the microphone is to clear up the volume issue, but at anytime you listen to me and you can’t hear me clearly send me an IM to let me know so I can try to make an adjustment. the software BlogTalkadio gives me is very barebones and the only way I can adjust my volume is to move the microphone closer or farther away from my face. It’s not like my Ham radio’s where I have a Mic gain that I can adjust. they have e-mailed me saying they are working on it but for now I’m stuck with doing it the hard way.


    Oh to send me an IM on Yahoo it’s txfellowship


  12. mark said… [May 8 11:59am]
    “It’s not like my Ham radio’s where I have a Mic gain that I can adjust.”

    Mark and LawDog, I’m assuming both of you are using some flavor of Windows for your OS?   Can’t you’ll go into the Windows ‘Control Panel’, open ‘Sounds and Audio Devices'(WinXP) and fine tune your mic gain from there to balance sound levels?

  13. Martywd,
    Actually We’re using the regular phone and phone lines, I tried a practice show using my carodless phone with a specail handsfree and it was extremely loud and nothing I did would turn it down, hence my new handsfree phone. But to adjust my volume I have to move the microphone closer or further away from my face. I’ll be experimenting tonight to find the proper place so I can be heard and anyone who calls can be heard.


  14. Got the file and listened, thanks all. LD you sounded fine, no bull moose snort at all! Looking forward to hearing the interview on Thursday/Friday.

  15. mark said (May 8 4:08pm)
    “Actually We’re using the regular phone and phone lines…”

    Ouch!   POTS!   Now I see the challenge.   All I can type is good luck to you’ll?   I’m sure hoping you can get this to work?

  16. Gosh, ‘Dog, I think yer bein’ a little hard on yerself.

    I know what I sounded like my first time on air. That seriously dents the self esteem. And I sounded so good in front of the mirror!

    You’ll be fine. Careful, though, once you hit yer stride yer gonna be a celebrity to an even wider audience.

    And us little people is kinda jealous, wantin’ to keep ya for ourselfs an’ all.

    When y’all are puttin’ yer pawprints on Hollyweird Blvd, try not to fergit us plain folk, wouldja?

    Meantime, I think I speak for us all when I say, “please, sir, can we have some more?”

  17. You were not at all yutz-like. The sound was wonky, but otherwise, it was fun to hear. Thursday should be fun!

  18. Smart thinking to call ahead of time and check the setup. Lucky you did, or you wouldn’t have found out about the audio problem. Your readers won’t care though … we’re all just keen to hear what’s said. Is that what a moose sounds like? Gracious! And it’s your smart-alec mouth we’re waiting for. I can understand your nerves… but you’ll have to come out from under the bed 🙂

  19. I’m going to take on a constructive role here. No criticism, just construction.

    Seriously, dude. Two things.

    1. The audio is bad. There’s no amount of work YOU can do to fix that. Whether you’re talking on radio, ‘net radio, televised or otherwise, if the technical end ain’t holdin up their end of the bargain you are going to sound awful.

    2. The things you say sound like things you’d say. Your delivery makes you sound a bit nervous, like you’ve never done a lengthy radio interview before (nearly a half-hour is painfully long in the interview world). If you’ve never done a lengthy radio interview before then you’re doing fine.

    Now for a touch of advice:

    Relax. However you have to. Have a TOUCH of Maker’s Mark (most interviewers will beg you not to, but anyone who’s been interviewed knows it works). Watch a sunset. Play with one of your many dogs for about an hour before your interview.

    Remember, folks out here want to hear what you have to say for no other reason than your blog. Most of us look at this interview as “The LawDog Files Live.” Do what you do, sir. You’ve nothing to live up to other than being yourself.

    Remember that last part before you pocket all your sarcasm;)

    Hope that helps some.


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