Some time ago, our very favourite litter jockey paramedic invited me to pay a visit to this years EMStock (pronounced “Em’s-stock”) down in Midlothian, Texas.

Everything was going better than fine until I left MattG’s place — and then things just kind of, well, went right to hell.

As a simple fer instance, I had no idea that I35 betwixt Denton and Ft Worth is actually a parking lot. And a single-lane one at that.

That’s the kind of mission-critical information that ought to be disseminated a bit more widely, I think.

Of course, I topped it off by getting lost. In Midlothian. Texas.

Which, in and of itself, is not a total loss, because when — out of a complete disregard for my gender stereotype — I stopped and asked a knowledgeable-looking local for [deleted] directions, I got the following, priceless response:

“Hayes road you say?”

*scratch, scratch, spit*

“Well, young fella, I don’t rightly think you can get there from here.”

Ellis County isn’t that big, Gentle Readers.

20 minutes later I am forced to resort to summonsing the almighty Road Gods to provide assistance* they kindly draw my attention to the little ‘EMSTOCK’ signs posted regularly along the road, and ten minutes later I’m at the EMStock site.

Only nine hours after I left home on a three hour journey.

Anyhoo, I’m there, and I’m not exactly sure where to start, so I spot a helpful looking gentleman and announce, “If I were a Louisiana swamp-rat by the name of Ambulance Driver, where would I be lurking?”

And Gentle Reader Wes replies, “I think I know who you are.”

I’m here to tell you, that’s right spooky, that is.

Finally got to meet AD and Too Old To Work, Too Young To Retire face-to-face, chatted with a couple of Gentle Readers, listened to some of the funniest war-stories I’ve ever heard, swapped jokes, appreciated some good music and generally relaxed in the company of some really salt-of-the-earth people.

Got to shake the hand of Dr Bryan Bledsoe, who has literally written the book on paramedicine; and the lovely LaFemme showed up to charm one and all.

Unfortunately, I missed Mr Fixit, who had to leave before I was able to arrive. Ah, well. Next year.

As a side-note, Nana had once relayed to me — in hushed tones — of a certain legend regarding some of the — minor — architectural details of the Waxahachie County Courthouse and the lurid story regarding said details.

LaFemme was quite willing to play chauffeur and tour guide and I am happy — I think — to report that I do believe that the architectural side of the legend seems to be completely true. Erm.


It was a thoroughly enjoyable way to spend a Saturday evening, and one that I’ve probably needed for a while.

I think I shall plan on attending next years EMStock, and if you are involved in some way with EMS, I shall hope to see you there.


*Best done by pulling onto the shoulder of the road, heaving a Rand-McNally atlas in a random direction, followed by stomping in circles while shrieking imprecations skywards. Use sparingly.

Reflections on the bailout

10 thoughts on “EMStock”

  1. I just figured EVERbody knows to take 35E instead of the West arm of 35 when there’s ANY sort of event at Texas Motor Speedway.
    That’s the only reason I can think of why 35W would be a parking lot.

    Next time check their website if it’s a weekend on which you pplan to travel.

    BTW, my word verification sounds out to,”Picks F’n Road.”

  2. Well, the thing of it is, we never take I-35 ANYWHERE. We go down the highways and byways avoiding interstate parking lots. And, had the Dog gone through Mineral Wells rather than Denton, he’d have been in Midlothian by noon.
    That’s not to say that he’d have found Hayes Road any sooner….
    This spoken from a person whose husband (Dog’s dad) was one of those unfortunate hombre types who would never ask directions. He got lost on the Island of Malta (11 miles x 9 miles approximately)and got ME to ask directions, whereupon I was told-in Maltese, because we were in the hinterlands where no one spoke English-that we couldn’t get to Birkirkara from there.
    Like a certain gesture, that phrase is universal.

  3. I did indeed miss meeting you. AD told me y’all were planning on attending that afternoon. Prior commitments with family and church group for the rodeo had already been made.
    I look forward to maybe next year, if not sooner.

  4. I would have done the same thing; I am not familiar with north Texas at all.

    And I hear ya on the recognized from the internet thing too. I had a woman walk up to me in Wal-Mart one night and call me by name. Seems she recognized my daughters and I from a message board I frequent. I gave serious thought to taking down all pix of my kids right then, but decided it was a bit late for that.

  5. Did they have sumpin’ going on at Texas Motor Speedway?

    Hm. I didn’t know that, else I’d have sent you around it, rather than right frickin’ past it, when I wrote out those directions to Midlothian.

    I gotta get another printer.

  6. I would laugh and point about getting lost in Midlothian, but, alas, I’ve been lost in Joshua.

  7. ok, and we now need Nona’s story on the courthouse!

    Glad you were able to hook up with a bunch of fellow bloggers – it sounds like a fun weekend, traffic issues notwithstanding.

  8. i’m with karla, i want to hear the courthouse story, all the more if its scandalous.

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