About six medium-sized jalapenos
1 block of cream cheese
12 thick slices of glorious bacon
1 pair exam gloves

Preheat your oven to 250 degrees Fahrenheit.

Now, put on your exam gloves. I ain’t kidding none. Trust me, you get jalapeno juice all over your crumb-snatchers, then rub your eye — or worse, go to the bathroom — and you’re going to be One Unhappy Camper.

Grab those peppers, give them a good wash and then gently cut each pepper in half length-wise.

Okay. Look at the inside of each pepper. You should see three ribs and a bunch of little white seeds. These ribs and seeds hold the majority of the oleoresin capsicum of the pepper.

“Oleoresin Capsicum” is a Latin phrase meaning — figuratively — “It burns, it burns, oh my God, it burns!””

So. Very Carefully cut each rib away from the wall of the pepper and discard, then scoop out the seeds. Also discard.

Fill each pepper half with cream cheese, then grab a strip of bacon, genuflect in the direction of Ohio, and proceed to completely wrap each pepper half. We’re talking mummify that dude.

That should give you about twelve bacon-wrapped, cream-cheese-stuffed pepper halves.

Put ’em on a baking sheet and bung into the oven until your bacon hits your desired stage of crispy.

Voila! Snack food.


Willing suspension of disbelief, my fuzzy butt

18 thoughts on “Noshies”

  1. Substitute smoked brisket or pork for the cream cheese, dust with lemon pepper and you have Cowtown Wolf Turds. They are particularly good cooked on the smoker instead of the oven. Use habs instead of jalapenos and you have Dragon Turds.

  2. For a larger version, use green (bell) peppers. Make the stuffing out of salmon (smoked is fine, fresh is best IMHO), cream cheese, a little chopped onion, and a diced jalapeno or habanero to taste. Optional to add salt, pepper or other herbs: I like a touch of salt, a dash of pepper and a pinch of oregano. Fill dat peppa with stuffing, then wrap with two, repeat, TWO rashers of bacon (must allow for the larger peppers, you know). Ambrosia!

    (For those who think that bacon and salmon don't go together, you haven't been out much, have you?)

  3. *drool*

    Okay, now I know what's on my shopping list for my next grocery run!

  4. If you want to really make 'em quality-like, you can blanche 'em by dropping the whole pepper into boiling water for a few seconds before removing them and sliding off the skins.

    But I'm usually too lazy to do that.

  5. Why just 250 degrees? I usually run the oven about 350 when I'm cooking bacon… I line a large shallow pan with heavy aluminum foil, and just lay the stuff in… I've tried cooking it on cooling racks, but that doesn't work all that well for strips, but may for the little munchies…


  6. Been making these for years, but I mix shredded cheddar with the cream cheese, about 50/50.

    Put them on a cooling rack on a cookie sheet, so they don't get soggy with the grease.

  7. Good recipe, we use it often.

    In the jalapenos, you can put a sliver of chicken, or a shrimp along with the cream cheese.

    Cook 'em on the barbecue.

    Damn good. A dozen ain't gonna be enough.

  8. Don't throw out the pepper seeds. Keep 'em in a pickled jalapeno peppers jar, like the ones you get when you buy sliced jalapenos. Then you can used them later for adding to/making your own fresh veggie hot sauce or marinating chicken.

  9. bogie may have a point. Son made a batch last night, and they were taking forever (and maybe drying out a bit) at 250. Snapped the oven up to 350, and fifteen minutes later we were savoring tasty goodness. Thanks, LawDog!

    Got to get some more bacon…

  10. Gotta leave the seeds in the peppers. Jalapenos are too mild to be interesting without them.

  11. when removing the seeds and ribs, use a spoon, the round shape fits the shape very well.

  12. tried some of these at a local watering hole, the other night…
    they served then with orange marmalade to dip them in, and they had pan fried them.
    a double order of these, along with a microbrew, are proof enough to me, that God loves me, and wants me to be happy!

Comments are closed.