Took Chris to Union Station in Dallas to catch an Amtrak train out to the Eastern seaboard — an interesting experience that I must comment upon tomorrow — but we got to the station more than a bit early.

As is our wont, after a shufti of the station and the surrounding environs, we went for a bit of a walk-about, and I showed him Dealey Plaza which he had never visited before.

As we contemplated the famous ‘X’s painted on the road, he turned around to find the sniper’s position and pointed to a building some distance away.

“Nope,” sez I, “It’s right here.” — pointing to the Book Depository.

He blinked.

“Hell, you could have hit him with a good, healthy spit!”

I have never understood the folks who get all fuzzy about the “difficulty” of Oswald’s shot. While not a cake-walk, it’s a shot that could be made by any competent deer hunter.

We then strolled over to the Grassy Knoll and walked around behind the famous picket fence — where True Believers have spent idle moments penning mawkish prose, Exhortations of Conspiracy, Declarations of Awful Truth, and the occasional sly wit, when I saw his mouth twitch.

“When you get back home, Google the name of the captain of that Jap destroyer that oopsied the PT109, and when you come back to pick me up, bring a sharpie.”

Oh, Lord.

I have no idea what message Lieutenant Commander Kohei Hanami is going to leave on that picket fence, but I’m pretty certain that it’s going to morally offend a whole bunch of JFK fans.



Oh, bother.
And damned-all will we do about it.

47 thoughts on “Snerk”

  1. I'm not and never was a fan of any Kennedy. Lying philanderers the lot of 'em. Except Teddy, he was a murdering son of a bitch. The world will be a better place when the whole damned clan has been planted. I await the Lt. Commander's scrawl on the pickets with bated breath.

    Gerry N.

  2. The captain of the Japanese destroyer Amagiri as Lt. Cmdr. Kohei Hanami

    Glad to help!

  3. Funny thing about that book depository. In order for Oswald to have made the shot and made it to where he was arrested, he would have had to have covered the distance at damn near a dead run. He certainly would not have had time for a change of clothes.

    Everybody who went into the room the shot supposedly came from, no matter how careful, taking all the time in the world, got covered in chalk dust.

    Oswald didn't have chalk dust on him when he was arrested.

  4. Maybe a bit if freeform haiku?

    Smelly yankee
    navigating on whiskey fumes
    takes a bath

  5. I'm not sure of the destroyer Captain's name, but I'm sorta-kinda-maybe sure about what he said after the P.T. got run over:

    "Steenking Amerikajin bakayaro!! You put dent in hull and scratch paint!! Venerable Emperor be most pissed!! I hope shark choke on you!!"

    (he typed, with tongue firmly in cheek) 😉


  6. "In order for Oswald to have made the shot and made it to where he was arrested, he would have had to have covered the distance at damn near a dead run"

    Or… he could have taken a taxi…

  7. Sitting at the confuser, in my new 511 tactical kilt. Can't wait for this

  8. As I recall, CBS built a shooting tower and a wooden track that duplicated the limo path as seen from the book depository, ran life sized targets on motorized trolleys at the same speeds as the motorcade, and had a spectrum of shooters taking turns in the tower. Even some unexperienced shooters, complete noobs, got the needed hits.

  9. Now everyone knows that Oswald was the only person in Dealy Plaza that didn't take a shot at JFK.

    Shoot, if only the Illuminati would let me use the time machine. I could make a fortune selling hot dogs to the legion of shooters behind the grassy knoll.

  10. "I have never understood the folks who get all fuzzy about the "difficulty" of Oswald's shot. While not a cake-walk, it's a shot that could be made by any competent deer hunter."

    AIUI, the question about "Oswald's shot" has always been more of a question about Oswald's shots, plural. Allegedly, he used an old bolt-action rifle. Allegedly, it's extremely difficult to get off three aimed shots from that rifle in the time that he had. Then there's all the stuff about the 'magic bullet.'

    1. Penn and Teller Bullshit*t: conspiracy theories. Did it pretty well, if memory serves. I'll try and find the episode on YouTube when I get off work, sure it's on there somewhere.

  11. DO, by all means, have some obliging translator give your efforts a presto-change-o into some lovely Kanji script that you can apply via the time-tested "monkey see, monkey do" school of copying.

    Think of the glorious consternation of historians in 50 years or so who make the pilgrimage and find your little easter egg.

    Personally, I'd have more fun burying an assortment of fired vintage headstamped Carcano brass and 1963 coins a few inches down in the soil hither and yon.

    It's hella easier than tromping out crop circles with a 2×4 or making wooden bigfoot tracks in new snow.
    Or so I'm told…


  12. I seem to recall a test where markspersons could only make all the shots like 3 times out of 10. and that was in Dealy Plaza.

    we won't go into the 97 different Oswalds seen in the area. the 3284 people seen behind the fence on the grassy knoll or the Alien Spaceship that Mindwiped everyone in Dallas that day.

    but there are still some questions about why the medical reports of what damage was where on his body changed so much between the hospital in Dallas and the Autopsy.

    and what conspiracy theorist can ignore the magic bullet!

    not to mention where all the various 8mm footage collected by the FBI/Local pd went. Zaprudder wasn't the only one.

  13. For years, I've made an annual early November trip in the dead of night to Dealey Plaza, and to cast a few verdigris-encrusted hulls of various provenance around. It's so rewarding to see someone find an Easter egg a few hours later.

    Some future archaeologist is going to think he's stumbled into Belleau Wood.

  14. Mythbusters did an episode on it, I think. Don't remember exactly what they came up with, but I don't think it was conspiracy-y.

    And while I'm here, death to captcha. That is all. (I know, I know, it keeps the spam-bots out, but some days it does a dang good job of keeping *me* out too.)

  15. I have never understood the folks who get all fuzzy about the "difficulty" of Oswald's shot. While not a cake-walk, it's a shot that could be made by any competent deer hunter.

    Or a Marine Rifleman. Oswald was a Marine from 1956-59. Qualified once as a Sharpshooter, once as a Marksman.

  16. From what I recall, and I might not recall well….
    The first shot was easy, it was the rapidity of the shots.
    In anycase the recent commission reversed the old one and noted that (for reasons that I can not recall) there were more than one shooter.
    For the Illuminati. Read The Illumintus trilogy by Shea and Wilson. It scrambles all late 60's early 70s extent conspiracy theories together. After reading that psychoactive set of books, and coming down two weeks later, I was able to have a conversation with a JFK conspiracy guy and understand what he was going on about.

  17. "unable to make the shots"…. then there is this .. the mad minute record was set by Sergeant Instructor Alfred Snoxall in 1914. 37/38 ( accounts differ )hits at 300 yards on a 12 inch target in 60 seconds.

  18. Chuck Dye:

    I think it was ABC.

    They had the top 12(?) national shooters try for 3 shots in the time frame available. Only one could do it, with the supplied identical Carcano and scope.

    That shooter started looking at the assasination, and came to the conclusion that "Oswald" only fired twice, that the third case found with the gun was being used as a "snap cap", for him to cock the bolt and pull the trigger while waiting.

    This sort of thing being overlooked was one of many things he found in the Warren research that he found puzzling. Then he discovered that there were no ballistic experts connected with the Warren Commission. That raised red flags for him. He spent more than two decades researching the assasination, and it eventually became a book, "Mortal Error".

  19. BTW:

    For those who seem not to know the scenario: The shot was from a sixth floor window, at a possibly moving person, in a moving vehicle, with the time factor of only being able to shoot through a gap between trees.

    He missed the first shot, which hit the road behind JFK's car. Fragments from this hit the back of JFK's head, and he was heard to shout "I'm hit!" These small fragments from the shattered bullet were found in his scalp, and were superficial wounds.

    The shooter corrected his aim (I don't recall if his sights were off, or what), and the second shot clipped his spine.

    If you are a shooter, you will find that book fascinating, since it is the story of a ballistics expert looking at the whole thing.

    His conclusions are controversial, but what got my attention was that all the factors that other investigators ignored or explained away with bullshit, dovetailed very cleanly with his findings. Everything fits together logically, and that is important from my perspective.

  20. copy of mortal error winging it's way thought inter-library loan as we speak. check your library folks. they got all kinds of strange and wonderful and confusing information there.

  21. OK, so when did/does Chris return, and more importantly, WHAT DID HE BLOODY WRITE??? 😉

    Semper Fi'

  22. Oswald was never tested for gun powder residue, they knew he'd come up clean. Lee got plugged by a fella named Jack Ruby, Oswald's father's long-time friend and associate. Lee knew Ruby his entire life. All three worked for the same Mafia outfit, that is, when they weren't doing odd jobs for the CIA. Funny thing though, all the folks who went on record about these facts met up one odd accident after another.

  23. Will, thanks for the book recommendation. According to that book several of the shooters could make that shot, only one exceeded that time. For the people here: the gun must have been one of the worst for bad chambering, and the need to manhandle it to get that rate of fire. But while that rate of fire was do-able, the rest of it is rather questionable — trajectory is strange, and if seems that two different bullet types were used according to the book's ballistic exepert.

  24. I was somewhat credulous about a lot of the medical forensic data the author claimed. I saw almost nothing giving any indication the author (the guy who gathered all the information, not the writer himself) to indicate any experience with human GSW beyond what he might have gotten from the premed course taken years earlier. what I got from the book is "I have been shooting and fixing firearms for a long long time so I'm an expert in all aspects of firearms forensics"

    some of the data was interesting. angles of bodies, how the "magic bullet" could have indeed been "magic". etc etc. but too much of it seemed much too questionable. I gave up about 1/3rd through the book. too much "I am a expert even though I have no experience" outside the firearm shooting and repair angle. (no pun intended)

    when I get the transdimentional framis back from the Walking with Dinosaurs people who wants to go back to Dealy Plaza with a crap load of HD cameras?

  25. I followed a link over at The Box Of Truth with the promise of a good funny story. Now two weeks later I'm finally caught up & feel as though I've made a new friend, yes I'm aware of how ridiculous that is.
    Lawdog I've often joked that the Andy Griffith Show should be required viewing at all police academy's. In order to instill in future officers the idea of being a servant, neighbor, & guardian, along with helping doses of common sense & humor. Any chance you'll consider teaching at a academy one day. We could use more peace officers with a outlook akin to your's.


  26. Ooookay. was listening to the John Batcheler radio show last nite.(10/17/12) speaking to an author who has interviewed a Cuban refugee who, as a young man worked a radio-intercept post on Cuba's north coast for their intellegence service. Listening for C.I.A. traffic from Miami, boats dropping agents or sabotuers, etc. EXEPT on the morning of Nov. 22, 1963, when he was directed to aim his antennas towards the Texas gulf coast. Guess what he heard? Yup. News of J.F.K.'s asassination…..

  27. I have read that the reason Jack Kennedy was out there in the first place was that he couldn't refrain from sticking his membrum virile into a known German spy-woman.

    The solution agreed upon by Jack's Dad and FDR was to ship him off the antipodes, the opposite side of the planent.

    Jack Kennedy was the guy who famously said to the British Prime Minister that he just didn't feel right if he had to go more than an hour or two without having a woman.

    I have no sympathy for horndogs of that ilk.6

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