Report follows:

To start with, Inmate W got wrapped around the axle because when he swapped his manky uniform, we gave him a 2X instead of a 3X. He proceeded to whinge at great length until I finally went to his solitary cell, listened to him, and then had him walk the catwalk in front of Officer H. Both of us felt the 2X fit just fine, so I left. Inate W is sulking.

Kitchen Contractor came out here and wound up being about 20 pieces of turkey short. Sigh.

Nurse F announced that he needed to do a TB test on Inmate B in SHU/10. I practiced my diplomacy skills, then went down to SHU/10 and asked the ever-so-slightly Throwed-off Inmate B if he’d like to have a TB test done. I’m here to tell you that inmate B does not want a TB test done. Boy, howdy, does he not want one done.

I was fairly happy that I wasn’t going to have to get near inmate B with anything sharp-and-pointy, but contacted LT SadPanda about the refusal, and that worthy ordered that inmate B be placed in a negative-pressure cell.

Thanks to the silver tongue of Officer G, inmate B chained up with no problems what-so-ever, but when we got to SHU/5, he decided that he didn’t like me. Must be the moustache. Anyhoo, apparently the crazy doesn’t go too deep, because inmate B decided to wait on the Saying It With Saliva until the door to SHU/5 was just about all the way closed. Happily, the spit missed me by a good bit, but it kind of hurt my moustache’s feelings.

East/3 has been opining about what they consider to be cold temperatures back there, but I’ve run a couple of temperature checks, and it runs about 72 degrees. Inmate U felt strongly enough about it, that when he was pulled out for Indigent Health, he decided to open the thermostat panel and fiddle his booger-hooks around in it. I had a chat with inmate U — I may have displayed teeth — and I believe that he won’t be doing that again.

We shook down West/7, but found skippy-all.

Central/North states that they had a quiet evening.

Central/Tower did the needful in West/9, apparently the wee lasses are stocking up on milk. And makeup.

Intake says they had “normal business”. I note, however, that Officer S has been trained on the Transport Van. I am happy to announce that he has backed into the River sally-port with no loud noises, that both the van and the doors still function, and that the services of the Fire Department and/or EMS were not required.

He really does need a booster seat, though.

Y’r ob’d’t servant:

LawDog