Jennifer and Evyl Robot have come to Rancho LawDog for a visit, and –as is required — we have made the rounds of pawn shops, yard sales and thrift stores.


Anyhoo, we’re at a newer pawn shop in Nearby Larger City, and I discover a fully-functional bang-stick of the crew-served variety. And it’s for sale. This is something that us gunny-type must be made aware of.

I’m about to call Herself, Evyl Robot and Jennifer over, but I notice something.

Jennifer has been examining a musical instrument, with her back to the proprietor.

Now, Jenn has the area awareness that anyone carrying a gun ought to cultivate. She is fit, has her hair pulled back in a no-nonsense ponytail and is wearing jeans. The owner of the pawn store is discretely checking out the view …

… and suddenly notices that the pistol Jenn is wearing behind her hip is printing big-time.

His eyes get real big, and he starts unobtrusively — he thinks — trying to get the attention of his partner. Partner finally looks towards the owner, and owner points at Jennifer, splays out the fingers of his right hand, then makes a fist and points at Jenn again.

Compadre blinks at him, then gives a small shrug.

Proprietor points a little more firmly at Jenn, splays out the fingers, mouths “Five”, makes a fist together with an “O” mouth movement; then points most firmly at Jennifer.

It is a wonderful moment when I see things click with buddy, and the colour drains out of his face and pools somewhere around his ankles. I’ll take money that in the deepest, darkest recesses of his mind he is offering God anything He wants, as long as Jennifer doesn’t start looking too closely at certain items around the store.

Over at the counter, proprietor seems to have something jammed in his throat, that multiple swallows doesn’t seem to be dislodging.  And I think that I may have seen an actual case of “flop-sweat”.

Not only did I manage the hide the grin, but I didn’t call out to Jennifer and suggest she take a look at the car stereo rack.

I think I deserve some sort of award for that.

Outside of the store, I explained to Jennifer that she had been mistaken for a cop, which led to giggling amongst all involved.



Election Day

10 thoughts on “Hah!”

  1. Why do you think they were so nervous? I'm certain they were just fine, upstanding citizens who wouldn't dare dream of fencing crap for the untoward members of the local community…

    I want more news about that crew-served bang-stick! Mostly because I wants one.

  2. You should go back and see if they can cut you a deal on the CSBS and then after the sale discreetly flip you wallet to your OTHER ID CARD (or pull out your other "wallet" as the case may be).

    I would bet as soon as you leave they will break the FTL barrier trying to get the "funky" stuff GONE.

  3. I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall after you all left.

  4. wait wait wait….

    You DIDN'T point Jennifer towards the more commonly fenced merch?

    I'm confused.

    Are you feeling okay 'dog?


  5. I agree. It would have been priceless to have her come over and give the crew-served bang stick a good going over, then a perousal of the jewelry and electronics sections would have been in order.

    It's good to get their hearts pumping every now and again. Keeps them young.

  6. A quiet comment to the local police burglary squad, might be in order.


  7. There are really people (in TX, no less!) who think that only police are armed??

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